


The Cold Months Seem Warmer

by aurics



Series: our growing love [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Drunken Shenanigans, Engagement, Established Relationship, M/M, More awkward confessions, Sloppy Makeouts, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, idk how to write makeout scenes lmao, kind of, literally just wanted some cheesy jeongcheol so here you go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-20 07:12:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9480623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aurics/pseuds/aurics
Summary: Seungcheol thinks it'd be funny to play a game and talk about 'current concerns' with Jeonghan. It's all shits and giggles until feelings get involved.(Inspired by svt's 'Honesty Game' ft. headphones)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> [This](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6eT9hcErcQ) is the dumb game the boys played!!! aka the time when the whole fandom discovers that seungcheol, too, is a dirty cheat. 
> 
> It's my first svt fic so I'm still playing around a lot with characterisation and things so please excuse any cases of ooc-ness ♥ I actually have a (short) second part to this that I'll probably post later on :)

There’s a knock at Jeonghan’s door that interrupts him from an exceptionally important pastime of lazing around in bed. He groans, yelling out _‘one second!’_ as he struggles into a hoodie that will hopefully make him look somewhat presentable.

His pained efforts were in vain, however, because of course Seungcheol is standing in the hallway sporting the pair of pyjamas that Jeonghan absolutely detests — a dumb navy blue, starry ensemble that makes Seungcheol look like a giant baby. Especially when he’s carrying a big tub of popcorn in one hand and a plastic bag almost certainly full of snacks in the other, excitement apparent in his barely-contained grin.

Jeonghan stares at him, unimpressed. “What? It’s a Wednesday night."

“And also the first night of winter holidays. Come on, I need someone to celebrate my newfound freedom with!"

Despite Seungcheol’s tendency to show up unannounced like this, he always remains on Jeonghan’s doorstep until Jeonghan makes his invitation explicit — often for half an hour at a time when they get caught up in a remarkably interesting conversation, sometimes so engrossed in it that the only reminders are their cramped feet and aching ankles. Seungcheol never tries to push at Jeonghan’s boundaries, always retreating back to his dorm room one floor above if Jeonghan doesn’t feel like having company; but never without an _are you sure you’re okay?_ A confirmation of sorts, just in case Jeonghan is being stubborn and is actually lying about his emotional dependency.

Sometimes Jeonghan likes to make him wait outside for fun, but tonight Seungcheol seems genuinely enthused about having company that Jeonghan is unable to stave off the warmth spreading in his chest. He does, however, playfully narrow his eyes at the popcorn tub. “Before you’re granted access, you better own up to the romcom you’re going to coerce me into watching."

“Are you saying the consumption of popcorn is exclusive to movie-watching?” With a hand on his chest, Seungcheol pouts, looking scandalised. “And I do _not_ only coerce you into watching romcoms. My palette is diverse."

“Get off it, I can't remember a day when we _didn't_ watch a romcom but I can easily recall watching You've Got Mail. _Three times,_ ” he laughs, opening the door wider so Seungcheol can shuffle inside in his black, fluffy slippers that Jeonghan would swipe right off if it was any other person — but it’s just Seungcheol being comfortable in his embarrassing get-up, so Jeonghan finds it hard to be anything more than fondly exasperated. He’s always had a weakness for his best friend.

_Best friend._

Seungcheol is busy setting the plastic bag of snacks on Jeonghan’s bedside table while kicking off his slippers. “Don’t act like you didn’t like it. Plus, I made you watch Kingsman, didn’t I?"

“…Literally that was _once_ but fine. Acknowledged."

"Anyway, sorry to disappoint but I have no blockbusters lined up for us tonight." He hops onto the bed where Jeonghan is sprawled on his back and mimics the pose. He turns his head, grinning sideways in that toothy way that makes Jeonghan momentarily breathless. “Just wanted to celebrate the end of my semester with you. Finally. Thank _God._ "

“Would love to join in the fun, but Theatre started their holiday two weeks ago."

“Stop rubbing it my face,” he complains while reaching over Jeonghan for some popcorn. “I love video game design, but even calling that final project ‘a challenge' would be a compliment."

“Don’t you dare get crumbs on my bed!” Jeonghan swats at Seungcheol’s hands, but this only makes matters worse as kernels of unpopped corn dribble past Seungcheol’s fingers. Jeonghan whines but his curiosity wins out and he decides to let it slide for now. “What was your final project?"

“Constructing a mock-up of an RPG arc. As a group."

Surprised, Jeonghan raises an eyebrow at him. “You’re usually fine with group work.” _Because everyone loves you_ , Jeonghan wants to add but doesn’t trust himself to say it without sounding more bitter than appropriate. 

"The group work part of it was fine, but… Okay, remember when I complained about getting teamed up with Jihoon, the guy on the accelerated programme? Well, turns out he isn’t so bad. I thought he’d be the snappy, slightly stuck-up type, but he’s actually pretty cool, though he can be a little intense sometimes. Found out we had a lot in common when we were experimenting with different music genres for the soundtrack. Like, his iPod is infested with pop songs but he’s got a decent library of alt rock!"

Something ugly twists in Jeonghan’s chest but he plays it off with a coo. “You must've had a lot of fun hanging out with him for the project, then."

Seungcheol just shrugs. “He made everything a lot more bearable, but it was still one hell of a mountain to climb. First, we couldn’t decide on the aesthetics because the entire group kept arguing over what colour palette to use. Then we had to make two separate soundtracks for the different stages, and guess who’s been hiding his musical talents under covers? _Jihoon._ He actually composed both soundtracks and they sound amazing, you’ve got to listen to them. _"_

“Holy shit, sounds like he’s the epitome of your wet dreams.” At Seungcheol’s horrified expression, Jeonghan blinks innocently. “What? You guys hit it off so well, he’s multitalented… why haven’t you taken him to bed yet?"

Alright, maybe that was a little forward and a lot sarcastic of him, but Jeonghan can't say he isn't pleased by the disapproving expression that crosses Seungcheol's face as he says, "We never really hung out for things outside of project purposes..."

"Okay, okay, calm down it was a joke."

"Didn't sound like one," mutters Seungcheol childishly. But the tension melts away as the conversation lapses back to project lamentations. “Anyway… There were two other people in our group who compiled all the components together and they were actually pretty hard-working, even if they were big talkers and wasted a lot of our meetings on stupid jokes, so you could say I lucked out on my teammates. Everything was going so well until the programming part…” Here, Seungcheol pouts. “Which was supposed to be my forte but somehow I managed to screw that up."

There’s a beat of silence before Jeonghan bursts out laughing. “ _That’s_ what got you so hung up over this particular project?"

“Hey, my name is down on the credits as the main programmer and coder. A single mistake and I can say goodbye to that 4.0."

Jeonghan laughs so hard he starts choking on his own spit, so he stumbles over to grab his tumbler of water while trying his best not to simultaneously laugh and drink in case he gets water up his nose.

“This is why you should aim for a solid 3.0 like me, you overachiever,” Jeonghan says once he’s recovered, which only elicits a sigh out of Seungcheol.

“And here I was, expecting some kind of consolation."

“Come on, you’re dealing with Yoon Jeonghan here. You should know better than that by now.” But as he settles back into bed Jeonghan gives Seungcheol’s back a couple of strokes, unable to deny him the attention he craves.

This seems to satisfy Seungcheol because for a while, only the sound of his munching on bits of popcorn and Jeonghan’s idle humming can be heard in the room. Once Jeonghan is done tweeting — _guess who the fuck showed up on my doorstep again! —_ he asks, “So what exactly do you want to do?"

“Not much, really, just thought we’d chill.” Here, Seungcheol seems to hesitate, biting his lower lip in thought before he turns onto his side to face Jeonghan. “But I’ve got a game we can play."

“So do I. It’s called; Abstention From Mobile Phone Games. You can only win if you lay off of those the entire winter break and find another hobby."

“Rude, you can’t say that to a _video game design_ student. Playing games is practically our research.” Always the more tactile between them, Seungcheol scoots closer so he can grin down at Jeonghan. “I meant a game we can play now. Without consoles or anything."

“What, like Scrabble?” But Jeonghan grins back anyway, saying, “Call. What is it?"

“It’s something I saw on a game show a couple of weeks back,” Seungcheol eagerly explains as he fishes out his iPod from the plastic bag he’s been toting around, along with the outrageous noise-cancellation headphones he’s so fond of. They’re neon green and yellow with an obnoxious black skull design splattered all over it. Seungcheol insists that since they’re a gift from one of his old high school friends, it’s only common sense that they be his go-to headphones. Jeonghan vehemently disagrees on numerous occasions.

“I’m not putting those anywhere near my ears,” complains Jeonghan, to which Seungcheol snorts.

“They're completely clean and has recently been disinfected, princess. Now let me explain the rules,” he points at the headphones. “One of us plays a song of our choice on the iPod and turns up the volume. Then the other has the duration of the song to talk about anything to do with our current concerns, or even past ones! Like letting out pent-up complaints, dissatisfaction or whatever ridiculous secrets the other is dying to know. If they manage to keep quiet while listening to music — no change of expressions or whining ‘ _what did you just say!!’_ — then they win."

Jeonghan lets out a noisy breath through his nose. “I feel like this is just an excuse for you to bitch behind my back."

“Nonsense. It was pretty funny when they did it in the radio show because they told ridiculous stories about the poor victim. I can imagine their faces when they watch the re-run,” cackles Seungcheol. “Don’t you think it sounds fun?"

“It’d be more fun if we record this whole exchange,” Jeonghan challenges, and before Seungcheol can protest, “That’s part of the fun, right? Finding out which bombs have been dropped?"

“True,” concedes Seungcheol. “But it should be a time capsule sort of thing. The kind you watch again in a year or two."

“ _Shit_ , that would be hilarious. We should have a reminder on our phone calendars for next year. Oh, also, anything at stake? Since you mentioned something about winning and losing."

“Easy,” Seungcheol flicks popcorn in the air, catching it with an open mouth. “Lunch. For the next week."

Jeonghan tries to keep his grin from getting too wide and eager, but ultimately fails. “Make it two and we have a deal."

“Brilliant."

The two boys roll around trying to find a comfortable spot on Jeonghan’s bed and finally end up under the covers side-by-side, back cushioned by pillows they’ve stacked up against the headboard. With his tub of popcorn in his lap, Seungcheol sets up his phone on the bedside table to record before handing the iPod and headphones over to Jeonghan.

“Don’t you dare try to lip-read,” Seungcheol mock-glares.

“What do you take me for, a cheater?"

“To be honest, your track record can corroborate this claim,” argues Seungcheol, earning him a playful pinch on the arm.

Of course Jeonghan actually thinks this game is ridiculous — it’s just another one of Seungcheol’s absurd ideas that often crop up during periods of either intense stress or boredom. But Jeonghan is willing to entertain him, as usual, because there’s never actually a dull moment spent in the company of a certain Choi Seungcheol.

He scrolls through Seungcheol’s playlist ( _‘I can’t believe you still have Taeyang’s_ My Girl _on this thing.’ ‘Old is gold.’)_ and settles for a slow R &B song. Just so Seungcheol can have his fun and Jeonghan can tune him out to enjoy some great music.

But he quickly realises how very, very wrong he is.

Isolated from the white noise of normal life, Jeonghan has nothing else to focus on except Seungcheol’s face, which takes on a contemplative expression as soon as Jeonghan slips on the headphones. There’s only the slow, sweet melody of the piano in the background as he takes in the sheen of Seungcheol’s black hair, slightly damp from the night shower he loves taking, and Jeonghan minutely wonders what it’d feel like to run his hand through the wet locks — then his eyes, long eyelashes framing the pretty curve of his lids that makes him look so _kind_ , so approachable, because that’s exactly what Seungcheol is. Jeonghan often hears about blue eyes being the most beautiful colour, clear like glass, but Jeonghan thinks he has never seen eyes as beautiful as Seungcheol’s deep brown ones.

Unconsciously, he lets his gaze slip down to Seungcheol’s lips. While he registers some words jumping out in his subconscious, all Jeonghan can think of is how Seungcheol's lips are soft-looking and just the right shade of pink for them to look attractive. He's getting far too sentimental and the song is of no help whatsoever.

After what seems like eons, the music dies down and Jeonghan lets out a breath that’s been constricting his chest the entire time. As if on cue, Seungcheol’s mouth clamps shut once Jeonghan shakes the headphones off his head.

“I saw you trying to lip-read,” accuses Seungcheol, eyes narrowed in suspicion and Jeonghan laughs derisively. If only he knew.

Jeonghan points to the tacky contraption. “I voluntarily put these tacky things on my head, the least you can do in return is believe me when I say I’m trying to play a fair game."

He squeaks when Seungcheol’s hands find his shoulders to shake a little erratically. “What! Who are you and what have you done to Yoon Jeonghan?"

“Keeping up that swindler act gets tiring, you know. Sometimes I’ve got to fall back to my default honest mode,” drawls Jeonghan comically. No one needs to know that he’s been too busy staring at Seungcheol to even _think_ about cheating.

“Bullshit,” laughs Seungcheol, and there’s a hint of fondness somewhere in there that makes Jeonghan smile back instead of stick his tongue out in retaliation.

Now, it’s Seungcheol’s turn to be deaf to the world and he taps once on his iPod.

“Okay. Can’t hear a thing,” he says in an unnecessarily loud voice, head already starting to bop to whatever beat he’s listening to. Jeonghan makes an exaggerated motion of covering his ears, which makes Seungcheol bark out an even louder laugh.

“You look absolutely dopey like this,” Jeonghan tests out. When Seungcheol maintains his smile and wiggles a little in his spot, he takes it as the coast being clear.

Pursing his lips together and shaking the flyaway strands of hair away from his face, Jeonghan plasters on the smile he uses to address a particularly pleasant theatrics director — the expression is neutral; it belies nothing of his steadily accelerating heartbeat and clammy palms, nor does it connote ill-meaning malice behind his words.

“You need to stop making me play games, my eyes always hurt the next day and I can never focus on the script. This kind of game isn't so bad, though.” Keeping his voice absolutely saccharine comes naturally to him, not allowing a slip of his facial expression to betray the contents of his speech. “Thanks for always being considerate when you come over, but honestly clean up after yourself. Sometimes I find myself sleeping on a bunch of chocolate wrappers and that’s not cute."

Jeonghan pauses, bites his lip in thought. “We need to get out of the dorms more. And not just to parties. It… It would be nice if we could just hang out together more often, you know? Just the two of us. Like, a study — session, or something, even though we’re both doing completely different things. You know that time we had to go grocery shopping together because neither of us had anything left after going back home for summer break?"

Seungcheol imitates a high note, and Jeonghan can’t help but be endeared by his antics. He shakes his head and continues. "I couldn’t stop thinking about it for weeks, because you looked so dumb playing around with really boring, mundane things but you also looked really happy, and at the time I thought _shit,_  if I had an ideal type, ‘being cute at the grocery store’ would probably be a criteria. Ah, what the hell am I saying?”

Jeonghan throws his head back and laughs, pretends he’s telling himself a joke when in reality he feels like his eyes are stinging from the weight of the words Seungcheol can’t hear. “Fuck. I think I like you. No. I do like you, and sometimes I think you like me too, but you’re just — _impossible_ to read. If one second I think your smile is reserved for me, you turn around and smile at the barista the same way. Sometimes when we’re walking and you take my hand, I think _there’s no way he doesn’t feel it too._  But the second Mingyu, or even Soonyoung pops up you take _their_ hands and swing them around."

At this point, Seungcheol’s movements have subsided to subtle nodding, but there’s a slight frown between his creases. What song must be playing, Jeonghan wonders, for his expression to be so solemn all of a sudden, but Jeonghan stubbornly maintains his grin that he hopes hasn’t turned into a grimace.

"You’re everyone’s best friend, you’re everyone's ideal type and I don’t know how to compete.” He ends up whispering, “I wish I could kiss you right now.”

Before Jeonghan can take his next breath Seungcheol is ripping the headphones off his head with one hand and cupping his cheek with the other — firmly, as he brings their lips together in a kiss. In the next instant, Jeonghan finds himself being pushed back onto the mattress, gentle yet with enough force to knock the air out of him. Seungcheol’s lips are insistent on his, moving as if he’d run out of air if he’d stopped and Jeonghan is so overwhelmed that he grips Seungcheol’s upper arm, nails digging borderline painfully into flesh.

Instead of pulling away, Seungcheol moans at this, opens his mouth wider and Jeonghan takes the chance to frame Seungcheol’s face with both his hands and deepen the kiss, working his jaw to nip at his bottom lip and lick into Seungcheol’s mouth. Vaguely remembering something about Seungcheol’s hair, Jeonghan reaches up and discovers that _wow,_ Seungcheol’s damp hair really does feel nice between his fingers. There’s distant music playing in the background — some soft ukulele chords, soft guitar, and it might be Seungcheol’s song spilling out of the headphones but in all honesty Jeonghan is fairly convinced he’s making up a soundtrack for this very moment where he’s got Choi Seungcheol on top of him, gentle hands hesitantly tracing a path down his jawline and neck, arms bracketing his head comfortably like he’s trying to protect them from the world.

When they part, Jeonghan pants for two whole seconds before remembering where he is and what they’ve been doing. Then he curses, flicking Seungcheol's forehead.

“Holy fu— little shit! You broke the rules!"

“Me? Breaking the rules? I would never —"

Jeonghan clamps a hand over Seungcheol’s mouth, effectively shutting him up as he picks up the pathetically abandoned iPod on the ground where Seungcheol had thrown it to. Sure enough, Seungcheol’s lie becomes apparent when Jeonghan clicks the power button and sees that the song is paused at the 23-second mark. The choking sound he makes at the back of his throat makes Seungcheol howl in laughter.

“You — you listened to _twenty seconds_ of the song? What the fuck was the point of this exercise — to think that I _stuck to the rules,_ me of all people —"

It’s a little irritating how Jeonghan struggles to stay angry when Seungcheol is suddenly half in his lap, mouthing at his neck with lips that wear a mischievous grin. “What was that about me being everyone’s ideal type? _Your_ ideal type?"

“Fuck off,” Jeonghan huffs but they both know he doesn’t really mean it. “This is humiliating."

“On the bright side, you get free lunch for two weeks."

Jeonghan looks up to give him a withering glare. "I hate you and you need to _go away._ "

But he’ll gladly admit to being a hypocrite as he reels Seungcheol in closer by the front of his shirt, already tasting his lips before they even meet. Seungcheol hums in surprise and delight, cradling the back of Jeonghan’s head carefully like he’s trying to savour the kiss through touch alone. The angle is awkward, and there’s more breathing than actually kissing and soon Jeonghan gets frustrated enough to roll over on top of Seungcheol, who places a hand between them when Jeonghan leans in.

“For the record,” Seungcheol whispers. “You’re my ideal type, too."

Seungcheol spends the night in Jeonghan’s bed for the first time, cuddled up chastely in the standard-issue dorm blankets that seem infinitely more comfortable when shared. And they forget about the video — at least, until Seungcheol wakes up and decides to keep it as his little secret, just for a while longer.  

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeonghan is slightly drunk and just wants to hear Seungcheol's confession again, but Seungcheol has something much better than a half-assed recollection of a five-year old memory.
> 
> (aka the chapter where Jeonghan finally gets to watch Seungcheol embarrass himself during Honesty Game.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you were expecting more uni!au... oops sorry to disappoint but my inner thirst for domestic/established relationship!jeongcheol was too intense I just had to write them as fiancés and totally gross boyfriends. Enjoy!

 

With great difficulty, Seungcheol nudges the door open with his foot once he’s finally punched in the correct passcode to their apartment. At times like this Seungcheol silently thanks his own good sense for picking a place where he doesn't have to bother with keys, because when he’s got an armful of a more-than-slightly inebriated fiancé such fumbling would have been a real obstacle.

Jisoo’s birthday party had gone on later than intended, and it could’ve gone on for longer had Soonyoung not downed one glass too many, forcing Jihoon to intercept and haul his ass out of the restaurant to prevent the older from causing a racket. Mingyu had insisted that _it’s_ my _restaurant, hyung, it’s really not a big deal_ but there were still other customers milling around, all seemingly in a jovial mood so Jihoon had turned down the very tempting invitation to ransack the entire place. Jisoo then decided to call it a night, thanking everyone as they left with a big, grateful hug.

That’s how Seungcheol finds himself stumbling into their apartment with steady arms wrapped around Jeonghan's waist, undressing the other chastely before bundling him into bed. Seungcheol somehow always stays the more sober one between them, even when he’s had twice as much as Jeonghan to drink.

“That was a good party,” sighs Jeonghan from somewhere beneath the covers. Seungcheol hums, unbuttoning his slightly sweaty dress shirt and throwing it into the hamper. “Jisoo always knows how to throw a good party even when he stays away from alcohol."

“I gotta give it to him,” Seungcheol admits, raising his voice slightly as he enters their en suite. “Not everyone can hype things up while being sober. It’s like, he’s got so much courage and fun in him that he doesn’t need liquid stimulant to enhance it." 

“You’re too fucking articulate to be drunk,” Jeonghan groans, sounding genuinely pained. 

“More or less sobered up in the cab,” laughs Seungcheol as he turns the tap on. There’s a great deal of rustling from the direction of their bed. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Gonna take a quick shower, I feel sticky and gross. I’ll be in bed soon."

“ _No_ , come back.” Seungcheol tries to ignore Jeonghan’s pleading because nobody wants to cuddle with a sweaty lover, even when they’re engaged and practically sworn to each other. There’s a beat of silence before Jeonghan says, “I like the way you smell when you’re sweaty."

Seungcheol is an easy man who admits defeat when he sees it, so he snorts and turns off the tap before half-jogging back to their bedroom and sliding under the covers. “You’re ridiculous."

“No, really, I swear. You smell like manly perfume. Like post-workout perfume smell, you know?"

Jeonghan scoots up to rest his head Seungcheol’s bare chest and presses fleeting kisses there. Although he’s being slightly suffocated in this position, Seungcheol is too content to really care. There’s a fond smile on Jeonghan’s face when he catches a glint of the diamond ring on his finger and Seungcheol unconsciously mirrors the expression. He weaves his fingers between Jeonghan’s to lift their linked hands up to the light and turns them from side to side, admiring the identical rings from all angles.  

“Your hand makes it look real pretty,” muses Seungcheol in a low voice as he traces Jeonghan’s more slender fingers with a thumb. 

“I don’t want to replace these rings when we get married,” Jeonghan says, much to Seungcheol’s surprise. “Maybe I’ll just stack the rings on a daily basis. _Double the emphasis._ "

“Yeah, wouldn’t want anyone to steal my husband away."

“I should be saying that,” Jeonghan pokes at Seungcheol. “You’re _always_ flirting."

“Excuse me, I’m not the one who’s been sticking my hand in Mingyu’s back pocket.”

 “Ha! That was funny. And also a joke,” he adds when Seungcheol levels him an unimpressed look. “Relax, I think your ass is _a lot_  nicer."

Seungcheol gently pries Jeonghan’s wandering hand away from his butt, much to the other’s displeasure. “One day Wonwoo’s going to catch you in the act and obliterate you."

“It’s okay, you know judo… or karate, or something."

_"As I was saying_ , we can always just stick with these rings for the wedding,” continues Seungcheol. “The only reason I suggested getting a new pair was because shopping for new rings sounds like something you’d get excited about."

“I like these rings a lot. I don’t want to… to…” Jeonghan’s countenance takes on an expression of abject guilt. “To _betray_ them."

The solemnity in his voice peels a laughter out of Seungcheol. "Wow, you are so cute and so drunk."

“Don’t call me cute. I’m sexy.” Jeonghan looks up with a pout, chin digging slightly painfully into Seungcheol’s chest. They stare at each other like this for a while — Jeonghan a little more unfocused, but at least he’s not dozing off yet — until he says, "Just wonderin’. What did you _really_ say to me, all those years?”

But Seungcheol is distracted by Jeonghan’s lips moving dangerously close to his nipple. Five years of this, and Seungcheol is still not used to it — still hasn’t developed an indifference to the warmth of Jeonghan on top of him, beside him, all around him; still gets dizzy from the affection he’s showered with, and maybe he never will. He hopes he won’t — not in the next ten, twenty, thirty or fifty years. He lets out a breath near Jeonghan’s ear that elicits a reflexive giggle out of him.

“Come _on_ , stop avoiding the question. What did you _saaay_?"

“Say what? What are you talking about, Han?"

“You know. Your _confession_.” When he sees the perplexed frown on Seungcheol’s face, he drawls out, “That time in uni."

“Actually, _that_ was _yours_."

“Only because you cheated.”

“Why are you bringing it up now?"

“Just feeling so lucky,” Jeonghan smiles, a little dreamily at their still clasped hands. “That I want to remember how it all started."

This kind of sentimentality is one Seungcheol can only experience when Jeonghan is either pleasantly full of good, expensive dinner or pleasantly drunk. He gives in to the urge to ruffle through Jeonghan’s short, brown locks and massage his scalp. It’s most effective after work, when every muscle in his body is impossibly taut — somehow Jeonghan instantly becomes pliant under Seungcheol’s ministrations, the exhaustion drained out of him like a spell. But even now through his drunken stupor, Jeonghan is obviously appreciating the sensation and hums contentedly like a cat being petted. 

“I said I hated your long, blue hair phase.” Seungcheol has no way of ducking away from Jeonghan’s swat, but he does grab the hand to press a quick kiss to it. “I did like the grey, though. What else did I say? It was a while ago…"

“Try to remember."

“I can barely think straight right now and you’re trying to make me dig up the past?” huffs Seungcheol, but he complies anyway — he always does, in the end.

Their conversation is rudely interrupted by a loud beep from Seungcheol’s phone, at which Jeonghan groans angrily. “Don’t you dare get up and check your e-mail,” he threatens, but suddenly Seungcheol is reminded of a treasure trove that was buried by their onslaught of date nights and giddy affections five years ago. 

“You might have forgotten about it… but we actually recorded the entire thing on my phone."

“ _Shut up_!” Jeonghan abruptly sits up, eyes still looking a little lost but suddenly very, very interested. “You changed your phone twice though?"

“I back up everything from my camera roll onto my laptop, so it should still be there. We can watch it in the morning,” he seals the promise with a light kiss but Jeonghan is having none of it.

“No, no! You can’t leave me in this suspense,” Jeonghan scrambles closer to Seungcheol between the blankets. “ _Please_  let’s watch it now! It’ll be fun."

“Babe, my main laptop’s in the study room, and it’s really, really late —"

“I’ll get it!” Before Seungcheol can protest, Jeonghan is flinging the covers off and speeding away in his boxers to their study room. Though it does make Seungcheol want to tear at his hair sometimes, Jeonghan’s obstinacy to get what he wants whenever he wants makes him a real passionate, relentless hard worker, and a serious contender as a budding actor. It’s one of the things that makes Jeonghan so riveting, a quality that gently pulls Seungcheol further in love with each passing day.

“Got it!” Seungcheol is pulled out of his musings with Jeonghan bouncing back on the bed and a laptop shoved under his nose.

It doesn’t take him long to locate the video, but it feels strange to watch it in his and Jeonghan’s shared bed as fiancés, even though it really shouldn’t be the case because this memory is as much Jeonghan’s as it is Seungcheol’s. He tells Jeonghan this and it brings a soft smile on his face.

“Just play the video, you sap,"

The camera is angled awkwardly, tilted too far to the left that all they can see is the tip of Jeonghan’s nose and Seungcheol’s side profile. Thankfully, the audio is nowhere near butchered, so they settle back on the pillows to listen, the laptop in Jeonghan’s lap and Seungcheol’s face buried in his shoulder; half in embarrassment and half in affection.

“Comfortable there?” In-video Seungcheol teases. He laughs when there’s no answer, and clears his throat. “First, let me apologise — I was the one who left your charger in the library, the one who stepped on the original copy of your script and also spilled some coffee on your carpet."

“ _I knew it_!” Jeonghan hisses, but Seungcheol silences him with a series of shushing, pointing at the monitor. 

The Seungcheol on the screen is younger, sporting horrendously styled hair that puts wet dogs to shame, but that’s not what makes him look so awkward and on edge despite the smile plastered on his face. “For someone who finds it so easy to get along with new people, it’s weird how you’ve stuck around me for this long as my best friend. This is so _cheesy,_ but thank you for not leaving me behind."

“Best friend, I used to hate that word with a passion,” whispers Jeonghan. 

“Stop interrupting, you’ll miss the best parts."

There’s a bit of jostling as Seungcheol changes position and the camera is nudged to the right. From this angle, they now have a clear view of Jeonghan’s face which looks distracted, attentive and stunned all at once. 

“What should I say…” They can hear Seungcheol muttering. “This is so awkward, how do those TV people do it… Look. When we watch this in a year, if you find it weird, you should forget it and we'll go back to being best friends. If you’ve stayed all these years, this shouldn’t make a difference, okay?” Seungcheol takes a deep breath. “That blue hair you were so proud of, the one you had last year? I didn’t like it, and I kept telling myself it must be because it seemed like you were trying too hard to make a statement. But I realised that it was because all of a sudden, everyone had their eyes on you. You were the centre of attention more often than before. And I didn’t want them to take you away from me, which is stupid because it’s not like we’re… you know.” Struggling with his next words, Seungcheol clears his throat again. “And I know it’s far-fetched now because obviously you’re not that shallow, but it still bothers me sometimes. Is that weird?”

Of course, no answer comes, and Seungcheol lets out a sad laugh. “Right, you can’t answer. Hm! Well. Let’s talk about nice things, should we? I remember the radio people doing that. Jeonghan, the most stubborn, strong-willed person I’ve ever met! Never one to shy away from new things, the one who adapts at LTE speed!” Even through the screen, Seungcheol’s enthusiasm sounds obviously weighed down by heavier thoughts. After a beat of silence, his voice comes up quieter. “You also have the most obnoxious laugh that makes me happy every day. Even though you can sleep for days, you still somehow manage to stay fit and toned. Every time you let me in your room, I feel like my… like my heart is going to burst from happiness, or something, and sometimes I want to ask if I can stay the night but would you find that weird?” Seungcheol sighs. “The song is probably almost finished now, but I hope we’ll stay friends for a long time, even after —"

Here, the Jeonghan on the screen removes his headphones and consequently cuts off Seungcheol’s sentence. 

“I saw you trying to lip-read,” is the last thing they hear before Jeonghan pauses the video and shifts to lock gazes with Seungcheol, his eyes now sharp and clear. Seungcheol is fairly convinced of his sobriety now. 

"Even after what?" whispers Jeonghan.

Seungcheol blinks. "I might be mistaken but... I probably meant after you find out. That I liked you."

Jeonghan's intense gaze doesn't let up, and soon Seungcheol is shifting uncomfortably under the scrutiny. “Was that… too much? Sorry, I had a lot of pent-up feelings back then. But you’ve heard all this before. It’s nothing new — not anymore, anyway." 

“I like hearing you say them. I still do. I can’t believe we've forgotten about the video until  _half a decade_ later. I can’t be completely eloquent right now, but,” Jeonghan bites his lip before smiling gently. “It wasn’t too much. I could tell you loved me even back then, and nothing makes me feel better than that."

“You were everything to me back then,” mumbles Seungcheol onto the side of Jeonghan’s neck. He tilts his head up. “And you still are."

He scoots up the bed, taking the covers with him as he leans in close to press a kiss on Jeonghan’s slightly open mouth. Jeonghan is quick to reciprocate while Seungcheol lets his hand settle on the back of Jeonghan’s nape, a gesture that comes automatically to him now. Though the alcohol has completely worn off, Seungcheol still feels light-headed when Jeonghan nibbles slightly at his bottom teeth — a habit he fully endorses — swipes his tongue along his bottom teeth. Letting out only heavy breaths at first, Jeonghan slowly lets out small whines, frustrated groans and soon elongated moans. Perhaps it’s because of the video, or the overwhelming feeling of being so content and satisfied — whatever the reason Seungcheol is softer and quieter than his usual insistent, brash self as he runs his fingers through Jeonghan’s hair.

Seungcheol almost forgets to take a breath when they break apart from air, so preoccupied with chasing after Jeonghan’s lips. He doesn’t even register Jeonghan's hips bucking up onto his — not until he lets out a guttural groan and places a hand on the small of Seungcheol’s back to press their hips together once, twice.

“You sure you’re up for it?” Seungcheol asks in concern, because as active as Jeonghan seems to be, his eyes are heavy-lidded — and it’s not from lust. 

“Not really. I’m tired,” whines Jeonghan, even as he latches onto Seungcheol’s neck and kisses down the column of his throat. Seungcheol snorts.

“Then get off me and go to sleep,” he chides as he pushes at Jeonghan’s shoulders.

“But you’re warm."

“This isn’t the only position where you can be warm.” With a heave, Seungcheol turns on his side, pulling Jeonghan closer to his chest. And this — this is the part of the day that is priceless in value and one that Seungcheol wouldn’t trade for the world. He kisses the back of Jeonghan’s neck and hears him sigh in contentment, already lulled into slumber, and for possibly the hundredth time that day Seungcheol wonders how he — how _they_  got so lucky, how one person can experience so much happiness in the span of a single lifetime. 

“I love you,” he says in lieu of a good night.

“Love you more."

Nights like these never get old, and Seungcheol hopes they never will. “Love you most."


End file.
